Looking Back, Looking In

Sometimes it is very worthwhile to look through old writings. I don't do journaling, but I do have several little blank books that I've filled with stuff. One has memory verses filed alphabetically (so I can put myself to sleep at night reciting them), one has only prayers of thanks, another has writings based on calendar days (many days missing) and one has longer Bible passages I've memorized or want to memorize.

Today I was looking through one of the books and came across this:
"There was no other good enough to pay the price of sin.
He only could unlock the gate of heav'n and let us in." (from "There is a Green Hill Far Away")
I can remember someone challenging that statement one time. He said that Jesus was just a man but was so filled with the Holy Spirit as to be perfect. At that time, even though I was a Christian having asked Christ into my life some years before, I did not know what the Word of God taught on the subject. I simply knew through the ministry of the Holy Spirit in my own heart that that wasn't right. How could one human being dying for another human being cleanse him from all sin? How could one human being live inside another human being to change and direct his life?

I knew that the influence of people could change me from the outside in, temporarily. But I also knew I needed a permanent scouring from the inside out and only God could do that. It wasn't until I began a study of the Gospel of John (in Bible Study Fellowship) that I found the stability of the Word of God confirmed what I knew through the Holy Spirit. Jesus Himself said, 'I and the Father are one.' (John 10:30). To Philip he said,' He who has seen Me has seen the Father.' (John 14:9). To the blind man he said, 'You have seen Him and He is talking to you right now.' Then He accepted the man's worship. (John 9:37)

Jesus, God Incarnate, the Word Made Flesh, Christ, Messiah can cleanse you of all sin and change you from the inside out. II Corinthians 5:17 says, "If anyone is in Christ he is a new creation, old things are passed away; behold all things are become new."

TV's Jack LaLayne said, "Don't you just wish sometimes you could be born again?" His conclusion was that that was impossible but you could firm up those old flabby muscles by exercise. May I say not only can you be born again, but Jesus told Nicodemus you must be born again to see God, to belong to Him, and to understand His Word. As He changes your life from the inside, you automatically become younger and more beautiful because of His  beauty. II Corinthians 4:16 says that though our outer man is progressively decaying and wasting away, yet our inner self is being progressively renewed day after day.

Sometimes it pays to look back.
Insightfully yours,
Paulita

On Insecure Days I Write in Pencil

It logically follows then, that on secure days, I write in ink. Some things are always in ink: my gorcery lists, notes to myself, editing of my own manuscripts. I'm trying to learn to edit other peoples' manuscripts in ink primarily so they can see what I write. Actually, I always critique my students' manuscripts in ink, usually colored, usually red. My adult writer's critique group is another matter (see above)
I mark my calendar in both ink and pencil. Pencil shows tentative plans. Ink means firm plans, and red ink shows doctor appointments and students' schedules.
I write formal notes or letters to people in pencil on scratch paper and then copy them in ink on the cards, but I write short Christmas notes in ink.
I'm writing this in pencil before putting it on my blog. Am I normal? I think so, but should I declare it in pencil or ink?
Insightfully yours,
Paulita

Isaiah

I've been studying Isaiah this year. Here are a few of my latest thoughts:

My nature, mind and heart are all idol factories.

My views of God are within my realm of existence, that is, my needs, the needs of my family and friends, sometimes disaster victims and charitible causes, or even Christian causes like human trafficing or martyrs.

But God has called me to ponder His greatness, His creativity, His justice, His grace and compassion so I can fall on my face before Him saying, "Woe is me!" Then I rise up only in His strength and say, "Here am I. Send me."

Insightfully yours,
Paulita

Please Forgive Me

He walked into my house happily as he always does, but when my little second grade student realized he had left his homework at school, he was distraught. His mother would be mad, he couldn't get his work done, he would be in great trouble at home.
His packet of homework wasn't due until Thursday, and this was only Monday, I reasoned. He had time to complete his work if he brought it home tomorrow.
But nothing I said consoled him. He couldn't concentrate on anything I had for him to do. He had forgotten his homework and his mother would be mad at him.
Finally I said, "Would you like to write your mother a letter and tell her you are sorry you forgot your homework and you will bring it home tomorrow?"
He brightened up. "Yes," he said and we began the letter. He wrote and I spelled what he couldn't.
"Dear Mom,
"I'm sorry I didn't bring my homework home. I will bring it tomorrow. Please forgive me. I love you."
When he signed his name, he relaxed. For the rest of our lesson, he didn't mention the forgotten homework.

Deep down inside we sense that sin requires payment, and we are right. We need forgiveness - the kind God offers.
Isaiah 53:6 , speaking of Jesus, says," We all like sheep, have gone astray...and the LORD has laid on him the iniquity of us all."
Insightfully yours,
Paulita

An Advocate for Alice

I haven't blogged this year (2011), but the time is right now. I got a new knee January 12th. It is now my good knee and the other one is on its last leg. (pun intended)
My roommate in the rehab place was Alice. I decided at once that God had put me with her so I could be Jesus to her for a week.
Alice did not wake up happy and ready to go in the mornings. Indeed she was a most unhappy camper. She said, "Bring me a pain pill," or "Bring me an anxiety pill." Repeatedly she said, "I'm so nervous!" Finally I said, "What are you nervous about, Alice? You are in a perfectly safe place and being taken care of."
Long story short: Alice was angry because she had not been part of the decision making in regards to the rest of her life. She is 91 years old. She has lived on her own for over 25 years, but she had fallen at home and broken her right shoulder (her dominant side). Her son, a 65 year-old widower decided she couldn't live alone any more, so he signed her into an assisted living retirement place. He said she could try it for three months and if she didn't like it, she could go ...where? home? Is there a home anymore?
Alice wants to go home. She does not want to go somewhere to play Bingo. She has taken care of her businesses and finances etc. by herself for a long time. She no longer drives and has to depend on rides, but she says she has lots of friends. Until a year or so ago when she only had nine names left on the list, she was in charge of her high school reunions.
Alice complains constantly of feeling she has to urinate. She has pain in her lower abdomin. She asks for a bed pan and then the bed pan hurts her skin. She gets dizzy when she tries to sit up so they can't risk a fall. Finally she graduates to a wheelchair ride to the bathroom about 10 feet away. Sometimes a nurse's aide treats her roughly because she has to go potty at their busiest times. Fortunately one aide said, "Hey that is part of our job. If someone doesn't like it, they shouldn't be in this profession." Amen!
Alice needs a calendar. She has kept track of her life for 91 years. Now each day is the same.
Today my roommate is off to see her Doctor. The uniformed driver lady came in and told her she was taking her to the doctor. Alice was specific. "You mean to Gould?" (the name of the foundation where her doctor is located)
"Yes."
At Memorial?"
"Yes, right next door to Briggsmore."
That was satisfactory.
"Do I go dressed like this?"
"Yes, you look fine."
"I can't see what I look like."
This 91 year old is used to getting herself dressed and ready to go on her own.
"Can you sign your name?"
"Why do I need to sign my name?"
"To sign out to see the doctor."
"Well I can scribble a little."
Here I interjected. "She's not incompetant. Her right shoulder is broken and she is right handed."
"OK, OK."
Why did I write this? The rehab place did a good job with a high maintainence patient. But everyone need an advocate when they are in the hospital or rehab or convalencent hospital. I finally wrote some of these things down and gave it to her therapist. I began to see more help for Alice, more different kinds of services that came to talk to her.
Jesus would want this kind of compassion.
Insightfully yours,
Paulita

Gifts for and from the Poor

There are times when I feel like I cannot be as generous as I'd like to be, especially this time of the year when we get gift catalogs - NO, not the kind you're think of, but from charitable organizations like World Vision, Partners International, and Food for the Hungry. Did you know you can buy rabbits, chickens, goats, cows, wells for clean drinking water, and even small dwellings for people who do not have these things? I've always let my grandchildren pick out something inexpensive from these catalogs to send overseas. Only last year did Stephen ask if anyone was going to eat the bunnies he picked out. I assured him that his bunnies were for breeding so the people would have lots of rabbits later if they needed meat. Whew!

Well, that aside, this year due to medical bills we decided we didn't have enough money to buy Christmas presents for the family, so I put together a book of stories to give to our family groups. Guess what my daughter pointed out to me when we visited a Starbucks last week. The slogan for this year on the Starbucks hot cup holders says,"Stories are Gifts! SHARE
Insightfully yours,
Paulita

Lavishness

I was thinking about how lavishly God prepares His banquets. There are several banquets mentioned in the Scriptures but this particular one is in Isaiah 25. It says "On this mountain the LORD Almighty will prepare a feast of rich food for all peoples, a banquet of aged wine - the best of meats and the finest of wines. On this mountain he will destroy the shroud that enfolds all peoples, the sheet that covers all nations; he will swallow up death forever. The Sovereign LORD will wipe away the tears from all faces; he will remove the disgrace of his people from all the earth."

The people will respond like this: "Surely this is our God, we trusted in him, and he saved us. .. let us rejoice and be glad in his salvation."

When I think about this, I try to imagine how I could lavish my love on God. I think lavishness may be an attitude.

This year as I decorate my home, I will use the same decorations I always use, but my attitude will be one of lavishness. I will think about welcoming the birth of my Savior as I get out my "treasures" and place them around the rooms. I will sing the wonderful words of the Christmas carols for Him. Then I will serve my family a Christmas breakfast banquet.
Insightfully yours,
Paulita